Apply Desk Directly To The Forehead!
Do you watch TV? If you’re reading this post, chances are you do. In fact, we’re 99% sure you do. A recent study released by California State University, Northridge states that 99% of U.S. households possess at least one television. Another study by Statistic Brain says that the average person will watch 9 years of television over the course of their life. That’s a lot of time in front of the telly.
We’re all fascinated by television. Whether you tune in to see if Meredith and Derek break up or kill a patient on Grey’s Anatomy, or you watch to see anchors make mistakes on the evening news (perhaps a future article topic?) there’s plenty to see and experience.
But what about all those commercials that play in between some of the greatest moments in television history like the M.A.S.H. series finale or Johnny Carson’s farewell? It’s estimated that the average person will have seen over 2 million commercials by the time he or she turns 65. No one likes interruption marketing in the first place, and here are my picks for the 10 worst commercials of all time.
#10 – Lamisil
This commercial is just bad all around. If you have a weak stomach, don’t watch it. Essentially, it’s everything you didn’t want to know about toe fungus. And there are not-so-cute animated characters to go along with it. But from a marketing standpoint, it’s effective. I officially don’t want to have a toe fungus and am considering buying the pill as a preventive measure. Get your barf bag ready and watch at your own risk. We warned you.
#9 – CareerBuilder 2009 Super Bowl Ad
There’s so much wrong with this commercial it isn’t even funny. No really. It’s not funny. What’s worse is that CareerBuilder probably had to spend about $7 million to get their one-minute commercial on the air. The commercial is extremely repetitive, and after about 20 seconds you’ve decided that you don’t need a better job, CareerBuilder needs a better ad agency. Click on the link to view this commercial, but beware of the man in the speedo…
#8 – PedEgg
Now I can’t really tell if it’s the product or the commercial I can’t stand here, but more than likely, it’s both. The commercial is pretty darn boring, and there’s no catchy jingle to spice it up (not that you can spice up a commercial about dead skin removal), but probably the most disturbing part is when the attractive woman decides to pour her dead skin onto a green towel to show you just how disgusting her feet really were. PedEgg, you officially earned an F+ from me today. Here’s the commercial.
#7 – EasyOff Soap Scum Commercial
Just because you have the ability to do a dubbing effect and lower and raise the pitch of your already annoying voice-over actor, doesn’t mean you have to use it. Aside from the voice-over, is it just me or do the showers in the commercials always seem dirtier than the shower at home? I’m not a neat freak, but I’d feel disgusted if my shower looked that dirty, and the woman cleaning hers looks so happy, it’s like she just got engaged. See what I mean here.
#6 – SnuggieDog
First of all, the dogs in this commercial look miserable. They advertise one of them as being so comfortable he’s drifting off to sleep, but it looks like he’s just lost the will to live. Also, this commercial attempts to solve the age-old problem of dogs getting cold in the snow, but I’m pretty sure evolution solved that one when dogs first grew fur. Sorry, SnuggieDog. Evolution has you beat by about 100,000 years. Can we please get PETA involved to stop the animal cruelty Snuggies bring to dogs? Human Snuggies are bad enough, but we have the right to decide not to purchase them… See the poor defenseless animal struggle here.
#5 – Cheers To You
The Cheers To You commercial is where good acting and horrible products go to die. And that’s being as nice as I possibly can about it. I might just dislike this commercial so much because it’s giving people false hope. Who really thinks that a CD saying “You’re great! The finish line is closer than you think!” with the sounds of a crowd cheering is the answer to life’s difficulties? One thing is for sure: I really wish I were there when they were filming this commercial, just to hear what the director was saying to these people to try and get the right reaction out of them. Here’s the commercial.
#4 – Hug-E-Grams
I don’t even want to go into what’s wrong with the product, so let’s just stick to what’s wrong with the commercial. First of all, there’s the thought that somehow wrapping yourself up in a long tube with hands on the end of it is going to replace a hug on Mother’s Day. Second, seriously? Have we run out of products to invent? I don’t have much more to say about this product except that it’s just not my favorite. Decide for yourself.
#3 – Halifax – ISA, ISA, BABY
Okay, this actually isn’t a bad commercial. It’s pretty clever to be honest. It’s a U.K. commercial about tax savings plans, called ISAs, and the quick-thinking DJ puts on “Ice Ice Baby” and sings with it, replacing “ice” with “ISA.” Why does it rank so low on the list? No one messes with the original “Ice Ice Baby” (word to your mother) and gets away with it. Take a look.
#2 – Apple’s iPhone 5 CHEEEEEEEEE….EEEEEEEEEEESE
Apple, you finally did something wrong. Very wrong. Your commercial certainly had a cute factor. After all, you can’t stay mad at a bunch of kids in random animal costumes (and oddly, one kid dressed as a green bean). Still, my main problem is with the person holding your new iPhone 5 and using the panorama function. Most of your commercials are amazing, and your 1984 commercial is still my all-time favorite commercial ever, even though it came out three years before I was born. But out of annoyance alone, I can’t stand behind you on this one. Check it out here.
#1 – HeadOn
I’m thoroughly convinced that future versions of cruel torture will simply be this commercial on a loop. The product, chapstick for your forehead (I’m guessing, since the commercial never really tells you what the product is for…) gets applied directly to your forehead. And that’s about all the information you’re given, except where to purchase. You can bet millions of people flocked to Walgreens to purchase Head On after watching that genius commercial. As for me, I have a headache. Does anyone have anything I can apply directly to my forehead for that? To watch the most annoying commercial in the world, click here. (For added fun, read the Youtube comments below.)
Well folks, there you have it. The 10 worst commercials of all time, in my humble opinion. Did I miss any? Comment below and let me know! It may end up in a follow-up article…
image credit: graur razvan ionut/freedigitalphotos.net